When is the right time to feel your best? The PERFECT time is now!
Right now I am very angry. You might want to know why and I will tell you. My beautiful soon to be daughter in law was made to feel less than perfect while out shopping for a new dress! I’m angry because a little piece of paper firmly attached to a dress with numbers all over it, made her feel lousy! The sales lady instead of building her up, chose to tear her down! How dare she? My newest DIL is perfect in my eyes, just the way she is!
Why do we let someone’s idea of Perfect make us unhappy with ourselves?
Whether the tag says size 10, 12 or 14 should make absolutely no difference to us, if we are feeling good! By good I mean, healthy and strong. Where is that “clothing bible” that says we are only perfect if we are a certain size? Why do we buy into that idea, that our bodies are less than perfect?
There are a thousand reasons why we are not all alike. Each of us is uniquely perfect just the way we are. Our genetics, our cultural heritage, and the way we take care of ourselves changes the way we look. Each look is unique and perfect just as it is! We are all works of art and our bodies are amazing in all that they accomplish in a single minute. If we stop and think about all the things our bodies do everyday, we would be astounded. We just take lots of those everyday moments for granted.
Genetics
Our bodies are predisposed to being like our parents and their parents before them. Our genetic material that tells our bodies all about us, was written into our makeup. We can’t get away from what is written in every cell of our bodies, nor should we!
Hair color, height, skin tones and everything about us is at the core of every cell in our bodies. You can’t change that! My pre-maturing grey hair has been a facet of many of the women in my past. Just as my predisposition to being a little heavier than my sister-in-laws are, is also written in my present and my past. It is my story and it’s also my history!
But, and here’s the big BUT! I am healthy! I have the ability to walk, run, swim and more! I just took up Hula Hooping for fun and fitness!
I have many friends that are fighting everyday to be slim. When I say fighting, I mean fighting. They won’t enjoy a cookie or a piece of chocolate to save their souls. Yet when I look at them, I feel totally sad. They are not happy either. Every day is the same routine for them. There is no joy in eating, drinking or being with others who enjoy those things. They remove themselves from all social situations so that they don’t have to refuse anyone’s hospitality. Or they are miserable because they can’t enjoy the treats and goodies. In the process they also miss out on a lot of laughter and fun. They in effect miss out on a lot of life! DON’T LET THIS ATTITUDE BECOME PART OF YOU! You are so much more!
Life is Perfect and Short!
Life is short! Life is fleeting! All of our days are numbered and no one will get out alive. What a waste of time it is to miss out on the fine points in life, because a few extra calories will make you gain a pound. I would not like to give everyone who has died from unrealistic weight expectations a dollar. So many have died from the ravages of Anorexia, Bulimia, botched stomach resectioning surgeries and more. We are constantly being bombarded by images of the “perfect” bodies in print media, TV, movies and more. Even in the cartoons, the bad people are the ones that carry a little more weight on their bones or are disfigured in some way. Why do we do that?
It’s Time to Take Back Our Lives and Embrace Ourselves
When all is said and done, it’s up to each one of us to embrace who we are. All of our warts and wrinkles are what make us unique and loveable. First though, we have to learn to love ourselves just as we are! Don’t let anyone take away your sparkle!
I personally love books that get my mind into a great place and this book of poetry does that quite nicely. We don’t need to be saved, we need to be our own saviour. We need to learn to love ourselves as we are without hesitation. No time to let negative thoughts enter our minds. We should be body positive from the moment we get out of bed in the morning to the time we lay down again.
Learn to remind yourself often that you are unique, beautiful, exceptional and ONE OF A KIND! There is nothing on a dress tag that can compare with that! You are a Perfect YOU!
If you want to know more about my Hula Hooping venture, stay tuned……
If you want to join me, I highly recommend the Ruby Hoopers group and Hoops too!
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I so enjoyed reading your post. It’s all so true. Learning to accept and embrace ourselves is so vital to living a joy-filled life! It’s hard to imagine that salesperson could be so rude. We should all try to be healthy and take care of our bodies, but that doesn’t mean being a size 4,6 or 8 unless that’s what’s natural for you. As you said our bodies are all tremendously different. Thank you for sharing at Party in Your PJ’s! I pinned to my Lifestyle board and shared!
Author
Thank you Teresa for your lovely comments. I’m really into living a joy filled life because life is short and we shouldn’t make it any harder than it already is. Fill your days with joy and laughter and everything else falls into place so much easier. Thank you again for your visit and do come again.
Love your quote – “Don’t let anyone take away your sparkle”! Thanks for sharing such an important message at The Blogger’s Pit Stop! Roseann from http://www.thisautoimmunelife.comR
Author
Thank you Roseann Hampton, it really upsets me when I see women who think they are the sum of their size and forget to look at all the gifts they share on a regular basis with others around them. It’s time to stop all of that BS and shine like we are meant to! Thanks for your visit I do appreciate it.
Oh my! What a stupid saleslady. She is not a lady at all to have made your daughter-in-law felt bad. I hate it when we are judged by the size of our body. I have never had diet but I eat healthy food. Life is too short to not enjoy the good we have in us. The medias are telling those people to judge how others eat and dress. It is on us how to react.
Well done with this writing. I loved reading it.
Author
Thank you Thelma for your comments. Yes the sales lady should take a few courses in people skills, she was sadly lacking these, but, the bigger issue is how we are brainwashed into thinking a certain way. Instead of being happy because we are healthy, we are made to feel less than perfect and actually buy into that mind-set! The media, all of it, should be doing a much better job at acceptance of people in all shapes and sizes and encouraging health instead of a certain size! Until people continue to put pressure on the powers that be, this will not change. Glad you have a good mindset with that regard.
I am comfortable in my own skin and I tend to ignore the people who have one track minds.
Author
I’m so happy to hear that Andria, not too many people are! You are in the minority, but I’m glad you are there…..
I think everyone agrees with you, Olivia, and is taking your message to heart. Be happy with who and what you are and ignore anyone who cannot see the joy in life.
Author
Thank you Pat for this observation, but until everyone is on the side of happiness vs. skinniness and acceptance, the message needs to be repeated and repeated. We are our worst critics and we need to remember what really is important. Health is important, looks and sizing takes a really distant, distant, distant, 10th or 11th place in the priorities that we should have in our lives……Thanks for your comments.
I think it’s a rather stupid sales clerk who would treat a customer this way. I’m sure it didn’t increase the sales she made, if any at all. Usually the clerks are prone to undeserved flattery to try to sell more. I’m so sorry your DIL ran into a clerk who would demean someone this way — customer or not. I myself try to eat what is healthy and not make me gain weight that affects my health, and apart from that, I don’t obsess over those few extra pounds I carry. I’ve lost 20 in the past two years and need to lose 15 more to keep my doctors happy. For me, that’s what matters, not how someone thinks it makes me look. I’m not going to let counting calories keep me from eating sweet treats at a party. I just don’t keep them around to tempt myself at home. I accept who and what I am while trying to be wise about what I eat to remain healthy. Health is more important to me than looks.
Author
I agree with everything you have written Barbara, it’s a sad day when we are made to feel like we are not good enough. The main thing is to be healthy and fit, but happy too! It’s a balance that is different for everyone. Even some doctors are crazy with the weight issue…..
Thanks for your comments, I really do appreciate them.
It is a constant battle to look the look. Fortunately, love is blind and there is so much more to see than just a bit of body-putty! I hope your daughter in law finds peace with her weight and that they will live happily ever after.
Author
Oh she is fine with her look, it was the disparaging comments that made her see red and me too. There is so much judgement out there. If you are healthy and happy, it’s no ones business to get involved, but to answer in an unkind way is downright wrong. Too many women cave into the Idea of Looking the Look at the peril of their health and well being. Thanks for your comments and for your visit. I appreciate it.
”Our bodies are predisposed to being like our parents and their parents before them. Our genetic material that tells our bodies all about us, was written into our makeup. We can’t get away from what is written in every cell of our bodies, nor should we! ” – these words touched me deeply. It is so true. Genetics is everything. Of course, we should try to keep ourselves fit and healthy, but there are things which are beyond our power. The sooner we realize it, the better. Great work. Shared on g+ and twitter.
Author
Thank you for kind words and for sharing. It really is a sad state when we let other people’s opinions make us miserable. Genetics plays such an important part of our physical makeup and there is no denying it. Yes, let’s be healthy, but let’s not brow beat ourselves over things we cannot control. I appreciate your comments and your visit.
I completely agree with you! I have the perfect body and I am the perfect age and frankly, I couldn’t care less what others think. My Creator made me exactly as I am and He has allowed me to live this long. I am a bit heavier on the scales than I was when I was younger and more active, but I feel good. I am sorry the sales clerk had such a narrow mind. Most likely, at some point in her life, she will look in the mirror and see that hatefulness is much worse than being a size 12 or larger. As for your future daugher-in-law, she is loved just as she is! No only by God, but obviously by your son and the whole family. phooey on strangers who wish to steal her joy.
Author
Thank you so much for your kind words Cynthia. It amazes me that people can still be so cruel with their words and thoughtless too! I still try to live in a world that I make better by being kind and never critical. Hopefully the sales lady will wake up to her insensitivity sooner rather than later. We are thrilled with our newest Daughter in Law to be…the wedding is November 11th. W are on countdown mode and so looking forward to this wonderful joining of two people who are very much in love. God willing they will be happy for many years to come!
I absolutely love this post. Thanks for sharing your important message. We are more than a number–whether it be the one on the scale, a dress size, or an age. Have a marvelous Monday!
~Christie
Author
Thank you Christie! I appreciate your support for all of us who have been made to feel less than perfect at any time.
Lovely post. That’s terrible that your daughter-in-law was treated badly by a sales clerk. Years ago I was shopping in a store at the Mall of America and a young clerk asked me if I was shopping for my daughter and I didn’t even think it was a teeny-bopper store. But I walked out without buying a thing and never returned. The paragraph where you talk about your friends being miserable because they are always dieting intrigues me. Yes, we are always “fighting” to keep weight off, but I’ve been on both sides. If I don’t “fight” I’m miserable if my weight is not where I want it to be and then my misery affects all other aspects of my life. But, if I do “fight” and I’m feeling good about myself and my weight, then I’m more positive about everything else in my life…but I miss the “goodies” and I hate to exercise. But, I still participate in social settings and have fun. I can choose healthy treats, and it’s always a good idea to provide healthy treats and things to eat at social settings for your guests so that they have options and will not feel obligated to turn down your invites for fear of temptations. Or, I just bring my own healthy snacks. But I don’t stop living just because I’m watching calories. I also do social things that are more active (like hiking) so I’m still getting out and enjoying life.
Author
Thank you Amy for your comments. I agree with you that fighting to keep under control (if it makes you feel good) is a good thing. So many friends I know are just not doing it to feel good, they like to play the martyr and make everyone else miserable if they enjoy themselves, or have comments that are inappropriate at any gathering. If it makes you feel good about yourself, by all means fight the good fight, but make sure it is a healthy alternative. Life is too short to let dieting rule your existence. I’m glad you have found your balance.